That Lousy thing called Friendship

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"You say I have hurt you?! And that I have been unfair to you?" 

 You are the selfish one who is so quick to claim how I have hurt you but you never realise how you make me feel. 

 Friendship is about sharing, caring, loving, spending time together and many other things that make you feel warm inside. Friendship isn't meant to make you angry or make you feel like you should not talk about your success. Friendship covers all jealousy. 

 You were the friend I experienced hell with. 

 I picked you up when you were down. I assured you of my loyalty even when it went against who I am and what I value. Why? Because I treasured you as a friend. I came back even when you had accused me of betraying you. 

 There were moments when I did things for you and I never expected anything, but then I realised that sometimes you were just my friend because I could get you things or be your diary. I wanted a friend I could spend time with, share secrets with and introduce to my family. I wanted a friend who would assure me in my hardest times that it will all get better one day but you were never that friend to me.

 You clinged to your idea of friendship thinking that it was true. Surely you began to realise that what you and I consider friendship is not the same. I blame loneliness for leading me into a wasted friendship with you. 

 I have lost good friends because of your terrible judgments. Judgments I trusted that you gave with a pure heart. I do not even know what it is. I am hurt and I long to forgive you because I hope that someday you would open up and say sorry. 

 I have been nothing but a true friend to you. I listened when you were in doubt and gave you ideas that will better your life. I worried when you were not around. I felt proud to be your friend when you succeeded . I never gave you advise that led you in the wrong direction, but you... wow...

 I write this out of pain and sadness.

 I write this in hopes that this is only a dream. 

 My letter to you my lousy friend. 

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